HalfLife Drabbles
by PointBlank2890
Summary: 9. Rule of Thumb "If you're in Ravenholm and someone yells 'Duck' You'd better duck."  Small drabbles that goes on in the Half Life Universe. Rated T for slight language.
1. H

[A/N: Here goes my first attempt of making short stories or "Drabbles" as I think they are called. Hope you enjoy.]

1.**Hacked**

Nobody gave a damn if Civil Protection gear was tampered with. It was designed to be expandable and easy to create. Besides, those workshops outside the city probably shelled out at least a couple hundred an hour, so modifying it wouldn't even raise a brow. It was his buddy Phyllis that taught him how to hack the headgear so it could be hooked up to play music. Apparently, pre-occupation soldiers did the same to their gear, so that gave him a bit of comfort. The player shifted to the next track, which was a rhythmic beating that bore into his ears. His head pounded as the surround sound capability of his helmet increased the loudness. It was titled "Civil Violation", and fell into the genre of pre-war music that was "Rock". Whatever the hell that was. He didn't really care much about it; the only thing that mattered was it made his job a whole lot of fun.

2. **Electric Boogaloo**

It was stupid really, how a stun stick stung less than a farmer's cattle prod. But hell, he wasn't complaining.

3. **Passion**

To become an Overwatch Sniper, you had to have three things: an Overwatch Sniper Rifle, The ability to patiently hide and wait for an unsuspecting target, and passion. The first two are easy, but the latter needs devotion to your work. This fell into two categories: Enemy forces, and anything that moved. Especially rogue wildlife. Birds are the common target. More specifically, _**crows**__…_

4. **Price Hike**

The gears of the bicycle groaned and creaked as it made its way up the steep incline of the hill. The muscles on his legs ached as he conquered the hill. As he breathed out in relief, a Civil Protection office stopped him by the toll station. Instinctively, he handed him his ID card. The guard processed it and proclaimed,

"Citizen, effective today, passage through this area has increased by three credits. The current toll is now eight credits."

Goddamn Combine.

5. **Improvisation**

Watermelons make great weapon against Civil Protection. Simply collect a couple of dozen of Watermelon filled crates, go about three stories up from an oncoming patrol, and drop the entire mother lode. The melons won't kill them, but the crates sure will.

6. **Creative thinking**

It's odd how Gordon never tried to pry a headcrab off someone with his crowbar. That would be so fun to watch.

7. **Summer Fun**

It's sad how the Vortigaunts still haven't found out a way to harvest the acid of the antlion workers yet. Maybe they'' get a chance to do it someday, we'll just have to wait. Which sucks, because it would be so much fun running around and killing Combine soldiers with water guns.

8. **Of The Strongest Stomachs**

I can vouch for the Vorts; headcrabs do taste a lot better than those sea lampreys. Yet still, neither of the two tastes anything like seafood.

9. **Rule of thumb**

If you're in Ravenholm and someone yells "Duck!" you'd better duck.

10. **Requiem**

He aimed the pistol up to his face, and fired into the headcrab. The things fell off, and the body staggered forward. Between the moment that it began moving forward, and the time It hit the ground, he could've sworn it said "Thank you."

11. **Gnome**

Gordon still wasn't sure why he kept bringing that thing with him. It sure as hell got him a lot of stares inside White Forest. But the thing…With its white bushy beard, smiling face, and hands inside its pockets like it didn't have a care in the world. It mesmerized him.

12. **Alyx's Gun**

Two soldiers appeared in front of her. With two shots to the head, they were down. Entering a hallway, she was met by more patrolling guards. She depressed a button to the side of her gun and pulled on the butt and the barrel. The pistol transformed into a submachine gun, mowing down the patrols in a heartbeat. She exited out a broken wall, fighting raged all around her. Pressing the button once more, she expanded the gun, making it into an Assault Rifle. She raised the gun and took aim. Game on.

13. **Nightmare Fuel**

One time in City 12, Resistance fighters had come up with the brilliant plan of packing high explosives into small dolls. They'd then place these Nightmare Fuel inducers into certain choke points and ambush spots; wherein it would blow up when enemies would get near. It was only a matter of time before Overwatch began babbling about "Highly Hazardous Remote Detonated Infant Analogues."

14. **Malfunction**

IN City 14, food dispensers were often known to go wonky at times and shell out Manhacks at waiting Citizens. Of course, Civil Protection simply chuckled as the machines tore through the Citizens…to the tune of "Yakety Sax".

15. **Star Wars**

"How come we haven't yet come up with a Dark Energy saber? Man, that would kick Combine ass."

16. **Burning Napalm**

Obviously, a flamethrower can kill more things than an Immolator. I mean come on, it creates a 200 foot jet of flame for Pete's sake!

17. **AR3**

"Ever seen an Ar3 before?"

"Don't drag me into this pointless argument again."

18. **Alan Wake**

"Cool, a Flare Gun!"

"Great, now all you need is an enemy that is damaged by light."

"Don't need to, I'm not going to use it for artificial lighting or that sort of crap. Now if you'll excuse me, I need do something."

"Which is?"

"Find some zombies. They may be immune to light, but they sure aren't immune to fire."

19. **Mental note**

Fast zombies can crash through skylights. Try to remember that.

20. **Road Hazard**

Back in the day, people feared those cement blocks in the highway that suddenly came out of nowhere. But now, they're more scared of crashing into a force field.

21. **It's all in the wrist**

I dreamed that I did my best magic trick in front of an Advisor. When I finished the trick, it said to me, "I know how you did that."

22. **Taxidermy**

It's never easy turning a kitty right side out.

23. **Fishing Trip**

"I once caught a leech this big."

"Screw that, I once caught an Ichthyosaur."

24. **Shame and Blame**

"One time, we found a small infant, around two to three years old, possessed by a headcrab. Obviously, no one in the squad wanted to shoot it, and it just trudged along towards us. So we dug a small pit it couldn't get out of, doused it with gasoline, and started throwing flares in. That way, nobody could blame, yet everybody feels shame.

25. **Triage of Winston at Dawn break**

Dawn rises upon the unmoving body of Winston. He lies on the floor of an unnamed garage, his blood pooling around him. With each gasp of air he takes, his chest heaves; inducing waves of pain throughout his shattered form. Beside him, Leon and a female medic tend to him. They whisper that everything would be okay. He knows they're lying. Suddenly, a new figure appears. A hazy orange and yellow silhouette stands in the direction of the light, blending itself to the beams that danced upon his face. His eyes widen as the figure becomes more and more recognizable. It was Gordon Freeman. _The _Dr. Freeman; Right next to him and clutching his hand, assuring him that he'll take care of things. The female medic stands aside as Freeman takes over, spouting orders to collect the tools he'll need. The rumors were all true; he did bring forth hope in the world. But alas, he knew for sure that he would never see this hope evolve and empower his comrades; give them the will to fight the oppressive power of the Combine. As his time grew nearer and nearer, his face grew into a gentle smile. He had seen the new sign of Hope for Mankind, the Hope that would spark the Uprising, the Hope that would completely and utterly destroy the dictators. The Hope that is the warm and caressing light of another day.


	2. A

26. **Grossed Out**

"Disgusting; I wouldn't touch that with a 10- foot pole suspended in front of a Zero Point Energy Field Manipulator."

27. **Particle Guy**

"Particle guy, particle guy. Does whatever a Particle Guy does…"

28. **Reinforcements**

"One pistol wielding CP is a whole lotta different from one with a dozen Manhacks by his side."

29. **Grand Theft Auto**

Gordon felt the wind hit his face as the car they were in reached maximum speed. Beside him, Alyx held on for dear life while at the same time, was having a giggling fit. A group of Headcrab Zombies came into view. Alyx fired upon them with her machine pistol, while Gordon ran over the nearest one. It felt just like GTA.

30. **Discipline**

"Sir?"

"Yes Private?"

"Why are we doing all this drills and pushups?"

"We need to be more organized and precise Private. The Combine does not do this. They implant the training and experience directly into the brain; nut for us, we get to do it the old fashioned way: training."

"But is it really necessary sir? I mean, shouldn't we be out there; fighting and helping the troops?"

"Private, you can teach any nut to fire a gun, but it takes skill and discipline to engage in warfare. Now, do thirty more pushups-"he rose to his feet and dusted himself off. "-and stop questioning a higher ranking officer."

"Aw sir…"

"Make that fifty. And stop complaining."

31. **Procreation Mishap**

Dr. Lay Maxwell rubbed his temples. He just received another accident report about a couple who had rather gotten too kinky with a Stunstick… He sighed; he wasn't getting enough to do this sorta crap.

32. **Supply problem?**

Greg sighed. It seemed everyone had a gun but him.

33. **Sober Realization**

The next time someone proposes to eat Headcrabs, tell him that they look like giant ticks.

34. **Point Insertion**

"I swear, if you do that again, I will take this stunstick and shove it up your-"

35. **Dead City**

Some call it City 13, most call it the city of the dead.

36. **DO EVERYTHING!**

"Ramirez, tell Dr. Freeman to reload!"

37. **Jeff Wayne**

"Sir?"

"What is it now Private?"

"Did that Strider just go 'Ulla'?"

38. **Side note**

On rare occasions, Fast zombies can throw back grenades.

39. **Fun Fact**

Stalkers make silly faces when nobody's looking

40. **Background Checking**

Sadly, the Resistance does not go through background checks.

Fortunately, the same is for Civil Protection.

41. **CP Requirements**

"Tell me Citizen, why do you wish to join Civil Protection?"

"I like to be on the winning side officer; and I want to beat the crap out of people and get paid to do it."

42. **Fate worse than death**

Being turned into a Stalker is a Citizen's worst nightmare.

43. **Fun and games**

Dark energy dodge ball, anyone?

44. **Very sticky bomb**

There was this idiot in White Forest who got a Strider Buster stuck to his head. What racked up the face palms however, was the fact that he insisted on the defending the base when the attack came. Eventually, Overwatch snipers got him. Literal 'BOOM HEADSHOT!' ensued.

45. **Rule of Thumb II**

Always carry a moist toilette

46. **Hopper Sweeper**

"Why are you here?"

"I want to make this land safe!"

"Why are you here soldier?"

"I'm here because I'm bored!"

47. **Quantum Problems**

"Oh fiddlesticks, What now?"

48. **Ichthyosaur Man**

'He's hungry for some big time justice'

49. **Programming fun**

"Dude."

"What?"

"Look what I made. It's a simulator that lets you control Manhacks!"

50. **Payback**

"Eat fléchettes, bitch!"

[A/N:: Thus ends another 25 drabbles. Gosh, this took a long time. Need to update more stories…]


	3. L

51. **One word**

RESIST

52. **Two words**

Civil Protection

53. **Three words**

Gordon Freeman Song

54. **Four words**

Non Mechanical Reproduction Simulation

55. **Five Words**

Gordon Freeman Saved My Life

56. **Six words**

Continue functioning, my mechanical heart.

57. **Seven Words**

Lay Maxwell hates kinky couples with Stunsticks

58. **Eight words**

That Strider is charging up its dong cannon!

59. **Nine words**

The Resistance hates Odessa Cubbage because he's a liar.

60. **Ten words**

Rocket Propelled Gordon. It makes sense because he's a physicist.

61. **Eleven words**

Funny Combine swinging from the ceiling attached by a steel rebar

62. **Twelve words**

Number Twelve contains exactly twelve words no matter how you read it

63. **Thirteen words**

City thirteen was never occupied again even after the Combine regained the area.

64. **Fourteen words**

The dude sitting next to me is playing death metal over the speakers. Grrr…

65. **Fifteen Words**

Does anyone else have noticed how the Overwatch voice sounds like GLaDOS in Episode two?


	4. F

[A/N: Here are some TV Tropes related ones. Enjoy! And oh, don't forget to R & R, it gets lonely here.]

66. **Dramatic Shotgun Cock**

Whenever entering a possible battle, cock your shotgun once. It makes sure you've got a bullet in the chamber, and it also makes as a great morale booster.

67. **Apocalyptic Log**

Looking back, I never could really finish those news reports of the Combine Invasion. All those people dying, all that destruction; it still gives me nightmares.

68. **Noodle Incident**

"Lieutenant? Remember the time when-"

"For the last time Private Michael, we agreed to never talk about the stun stick, watermelon, and the headcrab ever again."

69. **Ninja Pirate Zombie Robot**

"I bet you City 17 folk have never seen a Combine Strider soldier enlisted in Civil Protection that wields an AR3 that fires stun sticks before."

70. **Shmuck Bait**

"Go ahead and trip that laser. I'm sure nothing bad will happen."

71. **Disintegrator Ray**

The aforementioned Dark Energy light saber is this.

72. **More Dakka**

Firing Plasma can never live up to spitting out .50 caliber rounds out of an M2 Browning machine gun at 500 rounds per minute.

73. **Oh Crap**

Seeing a Headcrab flying towards your face is never a good moment.

74**. Did Not Do the Research (or something similar)**

The Combine obviously never thought of the consequences of a singularity device absorbing their Dark Energy and turning it against them.

75. **Creepy Doll**

And thus, we return to the City 12 exploding dolls. "Of what a cute-" **KABOOM!**


End file.
